20 years

Last January 22, I turned 20 years old. I had been thinking about my life and about how I lived the first 20 years. Some questions came into my mind; questions like "Am I glad with how I lived my first 20 years," and "What could I have done differently to make those 20 years better?" I have recently been working on a course called Interpersonal Communications. For the course I was required to read The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey. I had read Covey's son's book which shares the same title but it is geared toward adolescents rather than adults. Among many other things, the book talks about writing a Personal Mission Statement. After some deliberating, I wrote one that said my Single Purpose in life is to make Christ look good. I wrote that every decision I make must be based on whether or not it will bring glory to God--will it made Him look good?

Based on this mission statement, I looked back at my life and evaluated my performance. The first 15 years of my life I did not have very much of an urge to seek after God. I lived for myself. I went to church because my parents wanted me to but I doubt I would have missed it if we would have ever stopped going for some reason. I have always told those who have asked that I was saved when I was seven years old; however, I displayed very little spiritual fruit even after I was "saved." I was the same angry, selfish boy that I was before.  Then, when I was about 14, I started reading good books such as the one I mentioned above. These books helped to change my perception of life; I realized for the first time that the golden rule was indeed true. One of these books was Don't Waste Your Life by John Piper. It was from that book that I got the phrase, "Make God look good."

It was about this time that I attended a Basic Seminar by Bill Gothard. During one of the sessions he spoke on the assurance of salvation. While I had always said that I was saved, I had my doubts. The Bible says that "By their fruits you will know them" (Matthew 7:16). I did not see spiritual fruit in my life and thus I wondered if I was truly born again. That night, as Bill Gothard prayed at end, I gave my life to Jesus Christ and accepted Him into my heart to take me over and make me whole. I was 15. After that experience, I did see fruit in my life, the most of which was a desire to live a righteous life that would please God. Ever since then I have lived my life in an effort to do just that. I have stumbled along the way many times but by God's grace I have gotten up and moved on.

I tried to identify some of the things that I would change if I could about my first 20 years. I know one of the main things that I would change would be the amount of time I spent involving entertainment activities. Between movies, video games, watching sports and going to entertainment events, I have wasted a lot of my life. While all entertainment may not be bad, if it does not pull me closer to God and if it does not draw me closer to God, then what value does it have? Very little. I sometimes attempt to justify it by thinking that I will be better able to relate to others. However, I know from experience that the people I respect the most are the ones who have a dynamic relationship with Christ. I do not have to relate with everyone I meet, I need only to point them to Christ, whether they are Christians or not.

I am so grateful that Christ saved me from my sins when I was 15. That was the very best moment of my first 20 years. I would say one of the next best decisions I made (with the help of my parents) was coming to Verity Institute in Indianapolis, Indiana. Since living here I have learned so much about life. I feel as though academics take a back seat to the social and spiritual skills that I have learned. Just being around godly Christians all day long has made me a better person. I praise God for His goodness to me by placing me in a Christian home with parents who love me more than they love themselves and for leading me through each trial at the perfect time and being with me to the end. I am a blessed individual. I hope I never forget that.